FMK
FUCK · MARRY · KILL
The only NFL picks pool that treats your dumb bets with the respect of a hedge fund.
$500 in space cash. 3 picks. 1 winner takes the pot. No fantasy rosters. No waiver wire. Just vibes and violence.
CREATE YOUR LEAGUE→$30 buy-in · Winner takes all · No refunds, no takebacksies
THE PROSPECTUS
How It Works
GET YOUR SPACE CASH
Every week you get $500 of imaginary money to blow. It resets weekly because we're not monsters. Allocate it across 3 bets — minimum $50 each.
MAKE YOUR 3 PICKS
One Over/Under. One Spread. One Moneyline. Submit all three at once — no piecemealing. Lines lock at kickoff. Use decimals (-2.5, not -2½).
STACK THAT PAPER
Win = profit. Lose = negative space bucks. Your weekly P&L gets added to the standings. Best record at season's end wins the whole pot.
EXOTIC INSTRUMENTS
Special Bets
The stuff that separates FMK from your cousin's boring Excel picks pool. Use wisely. Or don't. We're not your financial advisor.
Three Horse Wagon
Toggle: "GIDDY UP"Parlay all 3 bets together. If they ALL hit, your profits get DOUBLED. If even one misses? You die of dysentery on the Oregon Trail. −$500.
"You have died of dysentery" — actual FMK result
Double Dare
Toggle: "GAK ATTACK"Double your weekly budget to $1,000. Minimum bets double to $100. Maximum exposure to embarrassment: also doubled.
Named after the show. You know the one. 🟢💚
Shorting
Toggle: "SHORT"Skip picking games. Instead, pick a PLAYER. You get the exact opposite of their bets. Over→Under. Spread flips. ML reverses. It's blind — you can't see their picks first.
"Nothing personal. It's just business." — it's definitely personal
Playoff Juice™️
Playoffs OnlyFinished the regular season in the green? Risk your winnings ON TOP of the standard $500. Extra funds split evenly across all 3 bets. No shorting in playoffs. Go big or go home.
Concentrated. Pasteurized. Ready to lose.
RISK MANAGEMENT
Forgot to Pick?
If you forget to submit your picks before the last game of the week, congratulations — you get the Default Portfolio™:
$200
OVER on MNF
$200
Home Team ATS
$100
Underdog ML
Think of it as your punishment for having a life outside of football.
TERMS & CONDITIONS
The Fine Print
$30 buy-in per player. Your payment buys the right to compete all season.
$500 space cash per week. Must bet exactly $500. Min $50 per bet.
Lines lock at the time you submit. No takebacksies. This is Vegas, not your ex's DMs.
Submit all 3 picks at once. No piecemealing throughout the week.
Use decimals for spreads. -2.5 is correct. -2½ is a war crime.
Thanksgiving is its own week. Thursday games get their own pick sheet.
Regular season winner takes the pot. End of story.
Weekly P&L doesn't affect your budget. $500 every week regardless.
No shorting in the playoffs. No Playoff Juice if you're in the red.
Ready to Lose Money
That Isn't Real?
Grab your degenerate friends. Create a league. Talk shit for 16 weeks straight.
LET'S FUCKING GO→FMK is not a sportsbook. No real money is wagered on games. This is a social pool for friends. Please gamble responsibly on everything else.